The Good, the Bad and the Lucky

We are gearing up for a very touch-and-go week.  We'd like to ask for special prayers as Andy is getting a risky procedure done to find out what infection is in his lungs.   

The team needs to know exactly what type of infection they are dealing with and can't do it without an invasive procedure.  They can not give him a supportive infusion of platelets because he is taking on too much fluid and the platelets come with more fluids to drain.  Because of bleeding risks, they will assess if it should be done Monday or held until Tuesday.  He will be put under for this, and on a breathing tube. Then, he may have to be in the ICU if they find it's too unsafe to remove it.  Even then, there are risks he incurs another issue simply from being in the ICU on a breathing tube.

The challenges here are significant and we are praying everything goes as well as it possibly can.

If you could, please pray for him, that the procedure goes well, and that he does not contract any further complications as he fights off two simultaneous cancers.

 

 

One of the Pulmonary doctors gives Andy an ultrasound on his lungs to determine the severity of the fluid issue, and also if there is a good entry point for drainage.

 

We have had classic Spongebob episodes on now for every single hospital stay and have no plans on changing that.

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We had a nice date night Friday and Saturday.  Andy got us a little pizza and I picked it up, and we ate while watching the sunset fall over the medical school quad and Plantation Street.

We also talked about our favorite vacations and trips over the years.  Andy's voice has been affected by all this, so I did most of the talking, but it was a beautiful time nonetheless.

Wonderful RN Night Nurse Ryley was on (which is always a major comfort - she does such lovely things like never talking loudly at him when he is tired, never clacking the door latch and getting anything he needs) and we had a great pop-in from RN Natalie who we also adore.

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I used to be really into astrology when I was a teenager.  I had this book I would flip through all the time for insights into different star signs, personalities, etc.  If I liked someone I had to know if "we would make it" - which when you are 13 you have absolutely no idea what that even means.  Maybe make it through 48 hours before you forget about each other.

With Andy, I knew I loved him early on.  So I had to look up our signs in "the book" and... THE HORROR.  We were not compatible.

Not only were we not compatible, in fact, the book instructed me (as a Gemini) that I should steer clear of Capricorn men at all costs - they were a poor match for my personality.  I would find him too judgmental, obstinate and rigid in his rules and definitions.  He would find me flighty, over-eager, chatty and annoyingly indecisive.

And I have to say, the book was right.

• Andy plans everything out like a military rescue flight plan, he chooses what he wants from the menu sometimes days before our dinner reservation, prefers the company of just a few close friends and the comfort of a stable routine.  He hates surprises, forgetfulness and changing things at the last minute.

• I enjoy going to large and loud parties, having many friends around even if they are not deep connections, talking all the time and am often irritatingly unpredictable.  I repeat myself and sometimes forget a decision we made.

But that's all OK!  And we love each other anyway!  No marriage is perfect and we have clashed in from time to time over these opposite traits.

 

Our star signs in our bedroom.  I think I got these at the gift shop at Tower Hill Gardens

And yet, marrying him brought so many gifts.  I have 3 incredible step sons in my life - boys I would want to know just as people even if we weren't related (they are that wonderful) a mother-in-law I adore and who has mentored me in many ways, the older brother and sister I've always wanted and a second home in Japan, 

Most importantly, I have a partner who would do anything for me, save and invest for my retirement, watch for my safety, open my door, pull out my chair, put on my coat.  He protects me, has never hurt me, never looks at other women, never lies to me.  He is never fake, ostentatious, and suffers no fools.  He loves me with all his heart, and I love him.  We have our problems like any couple and this drama we find ourselves in shouldn't put our relationship on some kind of pedestal.  

But -- it does remind me that it feels good to be committed to another person with your whole being.  

When you go all-in, just go all-in.

The biggest things that have worked for us: 

1. Always think well of each other.  Look upon the other with tenderness.
   
2. Do not go to bed angry and hold no grudges.
   
3. Work every day to cultivate 3 things: Romance, Friendship & Commitment 

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Being in the trenches with him, night after night, day after day, he'd do it for me, too.  He is suffering for our sake, he takes these drugs, these procedures, these pains, these risks - to be around for us. 

 

 The glow at night from his IVs. 

They will sometimes beep loudly when they are done at all hours of the day or night.

 

He has been hooked up to a heart monitor, chest port, oxygen and these medication drips for days and days.  Every time he has to move it's a puzzle figuring out how not to get wrapped up in wires and lines.

 

I don't know how he manages to not go insane, it might be a combination of painkillers and Spongebob, but I also suspect it's the Capricorn in him.

 

Many thanks to:

RN Natalie, RN Pam, RN Ryley, RN Jen B., RN Tina

Winsome, Brigitte, Sandy, and Bea

and the woman-with-the-plan, the extraordinary Dr. Pearson 

 

And to our friends and family and everyone reading:

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

for your love & support

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